patience is not my virtue

Last night I was tinkering in our garden trying to take some pictures around dusk. I was getting completely frustrated… You see, a few months back I borrowed then purchased a used Canon 17-85mm image stabilizing lens off of my friend. If you have never tried image stabilizing lenses…DON'T, unless you plan to purchase one because you will NEVER be the same. I was hooked from the moment I had first borrowed it and when he offered to sell it to me, I thought I would just die.

Well, last week he asked if he could borrow the lens because he was the official photographer for some big poker tournament in Las Vegas hosted by former NBA player Chris Webber. Of course I let him borrow it; after all he had loaned it to me. Well this was supposedly, some celebrity laden event…. A photographer friend we have in common had already seen the shots from the event and said, “There are some great shots of Gladys Knight”.

Wait, I’m sorry…when was the last time that Gladys Knight was relevant? And, no mention of the Pips not even one Pip. And, the BIGGEST travesty...no mention of my lens.

So back to my frustration… I was using the other lenses I had last night and they were just not cutting it. I missed my baby, my lens. There I was in the garden barefoot, my camera loaded on my tripod, wine glass in one hand while muttering to myself about the lameness of the lens and the shitty lighting. At this point, Craig poured more wine into my glass and quietly retreated into the house. Sometimes, he is the smartest human being on the planet…hands down.

After my unfulfilling evening of shooting, I text messaged my friend in the morning inquiring if he had returned…no response. I emailed him (we work at the same place)…no response. I email our photographer friend (he also works at the same place); to which I did get a response that yes, my lens stealing friend was at work, no he had not seen my lens and then off he went talking about those damn Gladys Knight pictures. In the immortal word of Doggybloggy…harmpf!

Okay, at this point I am expecting a ransom note. I checked the official website for the poker tournament…maybe he just got in this morning. Nope…July 25-27. Today is the 29th. WHERE IS MY LENS?????!!!!

Look, just return the lens and no one gets hurt. Oh yeah, and you might want to bring a bottle of wine to show your immense gratitude. Just call Craig, he'll help you out.